But then work sucked. Nothing went just right. The lessons weren't as out-of-the-park as I thought they were. The kids were just... bratty, if I can say that. Then I started thinking about my little one, and by the time I got in my car to go pick her up I was crying. And had a pretty hard cry on the way to her daycare. I just worry that I'm going to regret everything and feel that I'm going to miss so much with Adelaide over these first few years as I work and she goes to her little school. I know she is having fun at daycare, but I'm not having as much fun at school as I think I should be. *sigh*
So, after picking her up, I decided that we were going to go to the park. I just wanted to do something. So I grabbed a poptart (organic toaster pastry, actually, we don't eat "poptarts"), my water, my camera, and we headed out. It's a 7-minute drive, and we spend almost half-an-hour eating our snack, watching the other kids play, and checking out the slides (which she loved). We would have stayed longer, but the wind kicked up and it got cold.
The rest of the night was tough, but Kevin took her outside and they collected "Feel Good" rocks in a bucket for me and we spent some fun time splashing in the tub. We started a new bedtime routine tonight that worked like a charm and I'm hoping will have her sleeping a little longer, at least initially. (I know that'd be a miracle. But I know that better sleep will probably help me feel better, too.)
Here's hoping your Tuesday was better than mine.
As a working mama, I can definitely relate to this kind of day, but let me tell you that I so admire your choice to take little Adelaide to the park and let her (and you) enjoy the outdoors and not just stay home and stew (it's so easy to do!). Sounds like Kevin did a great job of trying to make it better, too. And new bedtime routine that works? That's something to celebrate. Don't be too hard on yourself, sounds like your terrible Tuesday wasn't so bad afterall :) Keep up the good work!
ReplyDeleteI understand how awful those days can be. When I've had a rough day at work because the students were being particularly bratty (yes, we can say that), I can't wait to pick Aida up from daycare. What makes it worse is knowing that Aida has had a bad day at daycare (they're not really nap-friendly there). I am sometimes so overcome by guilt and sadness that it cripples me. I applaud you for having the get-up-and-go to take your girl to the park after a day like that. I usually just take my bug home, cuddle up on the couch, feed her and allow her to fall asleep on me for a couple of hours while I watch bad TV or browse the internet. Your solution is better.
ReplyDeleteOh lady, you're such a good mama. I wish you could stay home with Adelaide, but (if you don't already know it) you're doing it right. You're being an awesome mom to her with the time that you do have together. Your day at the park sounds fantastic, and I can't wait until our weather is a bit warmer so that Ivy and I can have a day at the park just like yours.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much ladies... it's nice to hear the kind words when you may be doubting yourself. It's greatly appreciated!
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